They Just Don't Wanna!

Sometimes, when I'm presenting at a conference, activity professionals will come up to me and say, "My residents just don't want to do crafts! I try." This pronouncement is usually followed by a sigh of exasperation or a deep frown. Oftentimes the person relaying this information is glaring, as if to challenge any kind of rebuttal before it's even made.

What immediately comes to mind is a question I was once challenged with. The question is, "Who are you being?" To explain: A man comes up to you and says, "I don't know what's wrong with my wife. She just isn't into romance any more." You happen to notice that the man is wearing a dirty shirt that's hanging outside his dirty jeans. You also notice that he hasn't bathed in about a month, fails to brush his teeth except for holidays, and styles his hair with chicken fat. He adds, "I think she's frigid." No sir, you think, she probably has good taste.

OK, so I went a little overboard with that example. But you get what I mean. When someone acts a certain way, who am I being that contributes to the way that they act. Are you naturally more cheerful around certain people? Are there other people that cause you to dash off in another direction before they see you?

So perhaps your resident's lack of enthusiasm over arts and crafts has something to do with a particular atmosphere they experience in the present or experienced in the past. Perhaps you need to inch them into creative activities, inviting them to help you cut out some paper squares for a paper quilt. "Wow, Mavis, you're really good with the scissors! I bet you did a lot of sewing in your day!" Don't forget the exclamation in your voice and the smile on your face.

Or, perhaps, you could ask them to paint a simple object for you. "You're a natural with that paint brush!" They'll deny and perhaps bluster, but what we find is that they come back.

So put on a colorful apron or smock, add a happy smile, and invite a few nice people to join you for a simple activity. Don't forget to explore other "Fun Time" entries in this blog for a new idea or two every month.

"Celebrate what you want to see more of." Tom Peters